I don't get serious very often but.....

4SPEED427 · A Poncho Legend!

I don't get serious very often but.....

65beau · Addicted!

Carl Stevenson wrote:

...this afternoon I attended a funeral for a 48 year old man who chose to end his life. I knew him as a happy, fun guy.

Part of the service was a writing by his way-too-young-widow that stated "if only she had known, if only he would have opened up to her that he was feeling so overwhelmed".

This nailed me square in the forehead. If you are a man who is feeling like this and is not sharing this feelings with his wife, friend, pastor, whoever, please do so.

It was too much for this man. He had two severely challenged children and a wife who depends on him an awful lot. He appeared carefree and happy, as if all was good, but it ate him up inside.

The heartbreak he has left behind would make you seek help if you are feeling like he was, I can guarantee you. You would never want to hurt your family and friends as much as he has. Don't let tough times fall on your shoulders alone. Get help.

condolances Carl

Stephenzone · Canadian Poncho Superstar!

please relay our condolences. the family will be in our prayers.

73SC · A Poncho Legend!

That is just a tragically sad situation Carl. Men have a hard time dealing with their emotions and it seems so needless when so many are waiting to help. I pray that God grants his widow the strength to carry on and care for the children and I hope she embraces the help I know you and others in the community will bring her.

Canadian Poncho · A Poncho Legend!

My condolences Carl. We recently went through a similar situation not too long ago. A family friend lost her husband to suicide about 2 years ago. He jumped from the 20th floor of a building in Toronto. We were all in shock as he showed no signs of being depressed. His wife is still trying to deal with it. Last time we saw her (this past summer) she was very thin.

Todd

Taylor55 · Poncho Master!

Carl,I am very sorry to hear of such a sad thing . My condolences to his family and friends. His widow and children will need all the assistance that friends and family can provide and hopefully with their faith in God they will get through this unfortunate tragedy. Hopefully his widow will receive guidance from a pastor, priest or grief professional and not try and blame herself for his decision. May he rest in peace.

Al

Pontiacanada · A Poncho Legend!

My wife had a similar scenario happen to her.

Both a husband and wife were co-workers of hers. They just brought a new child into the world. My wife and I liked both of them a lot, and didn't see anything "wrong" with the husband. He left home one night, and killed himself in a hotel room he had rented.

It was a very, very sad outcome.

My wife, and I attended the funeral ... I could understand the sadness, I was barely holding back tears, but there was also a lot of anger and bitterness in the eulogies for the husband (by his family and the wife's family).

Suicide, like they say, turns out to be a very selfish/hurtful act.

It was one of the sadness days I've ever seen.

Sorry to hear about this tragedy Carl, I know how you feel ... I just hope that anybody reading this never has to know how this man's family feels.

427carl · A Poncho Legend!

Carl; Our condolences as well.. Thank you for bringing this to us...... We all get overwhelmed sometimes, and we need to know, there are those out there, who can help. I lost a friend 20 years ago, in a similar situation.. He needed money, and could not see a way our.. He gased himself .. I can still hear his voice....Last winter, as we started this site, we saw/heard from some, who suffer from depression....Hopefully awareness will save some lives...

Ghost Post · Poncho Master!

So sad to hear this Carl..

Sorry for the frankness to follow but I've lost a few friends to this including one of my best pals a few years ago who called me the night before he went to share a few laughs about old times, cars and girls..
The biggest things I've personally learned is how often all the signs are there and even more so if family and friends are in touch w/ each other..
One is how they often start to pass personal possessions on to family and friends..
The other and even more sad thing is when family and friends do take action, confront them and get help for the person, after time you may feel they're past it all and back to their old happy selves.. But often the reality is when they reach the back to happiness stage what's really happened is they've passed the point where they're contemplating if they can go through w/ it or not and it's only a matter of time before they actually do..

Prayers and condolences to this lad's family and friends..

57poncho · Uber Guru

Hi Carl Don't know what say but my thoughts are with you sorry to here of your loss

4SPEED427 · A Poncho Legend!

Speaking to one of the pallbearers today, he stated that he was totally blindsided by this as well. Absolutely nobody saw it coming.

I was not even a close friend, he was just someone I knew well enough that we would talk if we met somewhere.

I am amazed how this has affected me. I know it will pass, but I spent a good part of my day at work staring at what was on my computer screen and not really seeing what was there. So many thoughts. I feel so bad for anyone who has ever experienced this. I have never been sympathetic enough to people who have lived through this.

57poncho · Uber Guru

My Ex Wife's dad shot him self when she was 13 . she is now 36 and 7 year ago when we split she still blamed her self

2drpost · Uber Guru

probably the most selfish act one could do to his or her family.
you can only imagine the pain they leave behind.

427carl · A Poncho Legend!

Is it Murplys law or do we just hear, about more of this, at Christmas? cry

4SPEED427 · A Poncho Legend!

Yup.

427carl · A Poncho Legend!

and the

loves it...

speelman1958 · Addicted!

Sorry to hear the bad news about your friend, but prayers for the family will go a long way in helping them, it is one tangible way of showing support when you can't do anything else.
I just wish more people would think it a good thing to go see someone for some help in working through the tough times. We all get a doctor when we're physically in need, getting help for our mental, spiritual, selves is more than ok, it is a good thing to do.

4SPEED427 · A Poncho Legend!

It's just not cool for men to talk about their problems. We are such idiots when it comes to that, it frustrates me.

I have vowed this will make a positive change in my life in sharing with my wife when things are tough for me. She and I had a long talk last night. We haven't done that in a long time...

427carl · A Poncho Legend!

Good to hear smile Nothing bad happens, that some good doesn't come from.. Many lives will be saved, as a result of the lost, of the OPP officer and her family. Many homes now have CO alarms, that weren't in place last week...