August 12 Moved into our new home in Ontario, Canada. It is so beautiful here. The hills and river valleys are so picturesque. I have a beautiful old oak tree in my front yard. Can hardly wait to see the change in the seasons. This is truly Gods Country.
October 14 Ontario is such a gorgeous place to live, one of the real special places on Earth. The leaves are turning a multitude of different colours. I love all of the shades of reds, oranges and yellows, they are so bright. I want to walk through all of the beautiful hills and spot some white tail deer. They are so graceful, certainly they must be the most peaceful creatures on Earth. This must be paradise.
November 11 Deer season opens this week. I cant imagine why anyone would want to shoot these elegant animals. They are the very symbol of peace and tranquility here in Ontario. I hope it snows soon. I love it here!
December 2 It snowed last night. I woke to the most wonderful sight: Everything covered in a beautiful blanket of white. The oak tree is magnificent. It looks like a postcard. We went out and swept the snow from the steps and driveway. The air is so crisp, clean and refreshing. We had a snowball fight. I won, and the snowplow came down the street. He must have gotten too close to the driveway because we had to go out and shovel the end of the driveway again. What a beautiful place. Nature in harmony ? I love it here!
December 12 More snow last night. I love it! The plow did his cute little trick again. What a rascal. A winter wonderland ? I love it here!
December 19 More snow ? couldnt get out of the driveway to get to work in time. Im exhausted from all the shoveling. And that snowplow!
December 21 More of that white **** coming down? Ive got blisters on my hands and a kink in my back. I think that the snowplow driver waits around the corner until Im done shoveling the driveway. *******.
December 25 White Christmas? More freakin snow. If I ever get my hands on the son of a bitch who drives that snowplow, I swear Ill castrate him. And why don?t they use more salt on these roads to melt this crap?
December 28 It hasnt stopped snowing since Christmas, I have been inside since then, except of course when the SOB Snowplow Harry? comes by. Cant go anywhere; cars are buried up to the windows. Weather man says to expect another 25 cm. Do you have any idea how many shovelfuls 25 cm is??
January 1 Happy New Year? The way its coming down it wont melt until the 1st of July! The snowplow got stuck down the road and the ****head actually had the balls to come and ask to borrow a shovel! I told him Id broken 6 already this season.
January 4 Finally got out of the house. We went to the store to get some food and a goddamn deer ran out in front of my car and I hit the bastard. It did $3,000. in damage to the car. Those beasts ought to be killed. The hunters should have a longer season if you ask me.
January 27 Warmed up a little and rained today. The rain turned the snow into ice and the weight of it broke the main limb of the oak tree in the front yard and it went through the roof. I should have cut that old piece of **** into fireplace wood when I had the chance.
March 23 Took my car to the local garage. Would you believe the whole underside of the car is rusted away from all of that damn salt they dump on the road? Car looks like a bashed up heap of rusted cow ****.
May 10 Sold the car, the house, and moved to Florida. I cant imagine why anyone in their freakin' mind would ever want to live in the God forsaken province of Ontario.
omg, that is just too funny! i love living in northern ontario, it gives me 4 different seasons to bitch about. dont know if i could ever live in a place like florida though, there is just way to many polyester liesure suits for me. i could definitley do california though.
